I don't know how to use English.
I only know how to teach? no teach????
Nothing. Never mind.
byebye!
the end.
Saturday, October 31, 2009
I am going to dance to my own rhythm, rhym and music writetenned ? by? MMMEEE????????
yes i told you right (REALLUYYIRESO????) cut trash bye good bye.
i am a honestisticartifishwithabiggutsandtwobigsandales. I did MY homeworkinghardworkingstudentof eternaleducationalscientictichumanecomediasticworriorcalledLOVEplusoneeyeplushalfan eye.
You guessed right right?
my answer is always the very next to the next to the very last yet not the end.
So that is why you shouldnt have heard what i just said.
so pleaes turn down a request to give me a piano.
you have a computer.
so do I.
THat is why I am going all the time and never stop moving around.
because i am a bee like type of a fllower and a lionisticartificiallymadebywhoyoyougirltypemotherplusoridktheanswerpleasetellmekind of the right human typically spoken own language.
so please ignore her words and keep following your advice and stay alive.
this is the best advice i can give you.
sorry, i can do nothing but stay me!
so watch ME!!!! but never fly!!!!
CAUTION*I CAN FLY but YOU CAN NOT.
I CAN WALK WITH A TALE plus butterflies' help plus one feather from my best friend called Mino.
YET YOU MAY NOT.
your objection and yet but also
is to decide either or not to follow any of my advice of the world of brainstormingtechniqueofevacuation of vactination of a matter called poison of the nature.
you should watch all the apple give by nobody else but me.
ok?
i think i have told something that is and should never be accepted by anybody!!!!
but also by me?????
I am puzzled.
SO I start puzzling you one more time.
I m ready so i am not here already..........
now my job is to keep learning as long i can hear my silence.
because that is the sign that shows that i have finished working too hard to stay the most peaceful diehardest people on earth althoug i am not a human.
My job was to stay alive as an eilian artist????
im going to take all my time left for me in this story
to the subject of reading books.
so please turn off your computer and start watching movies.
I may or may not be one of them.
you may be the last to complete the task,
but there is no need to worry.
because i am always with you.
becaues you are my friend.
what is next?
i am going to go nowhere but backwords scratch this and add
upward and left!
????
my name is still a mystery plus chan in english???
or japanese???????
I have every possible answer!!!
i am a fearless girl yet the most peaceful and baby-like-body called an sivergoldenchestnutthatlookslike an ironplus a doll, colorfull leaves and a cuctus given my best possible answer on Sado. yet an adult with a watch of the world of the wisords and a strange teacher that looks like an extra ordinary person kind of a creative artist that may exist on this planet called school buildings may or may not be waiting for my next lesson.
so conductor, please read carefully and start playing my art.
i am going home to ready and study and steady.
i have grown up by being called an grade !!!! center of excellence of art school looking musical of hospitallicticallyspeakingphycedericpicadellisticalstudent and a strangest thing in my life.
im looking forward to see what you can shoe off to me!!!!
you can never win my game
because im just laughing and doing nothing but laugh my laugh.
wahhahha!
Get ready set and go!
the game has already started yo!!!
to all my couligues and students at AKHS:
your school smells very dangerous yet actually not at functining yet seeminglly working very right yet there is always at least one conflinct without resolution
so there is and has never been a situation called peace.
i got out safelly after teaching a course of living dead or sleep and stay silent and/or live vigorouslly and happilly ever after OR found dead by a mother called MOTHER F or R oh no! i cannot justify what is normally called injustice so i resigned before collapsing my own decisions.
STAND SAFE!
OTHERWISE YOU WILL DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PLEASE START WORKING CORRECTLLY>
THERE IS NO CONDITION OF PEACE IN THE BUILDING>
alcoholicsmellingyetseemingllyasleepandyetalwaystryingsomethinghardest???nimus minuets? and happenings of all the time with an fire alarm that do not know how to work (all of whom i now can call "friends") but your teacher has never taught you anything that matters in school. so i am not a good teacher but a good example.
i did all right at the school!
so i graduated by giving myself an ALLA
I can't stop being surprised by my own action, feeling, technique, plus an Aikido master of ceremonical scandals.
?????
I am paraparaperaahahahahanoko.
my name is!
pinoko
grin:)
*****
you are my star.
I love you all.
Thank you for listening carefully to my self-help-way-of-saving-everyoneofmyfriends'life-in-the-safest-possible-way-of-accepting-deception-by-the-----public-speaking-class-taughted-and-learned-by-a-challenging-happening-done-by-an-absent-minded-yet-always-awake-yet-sleeping-talkatistical-natural-born-with-no-bone-but-a-healthy-body-clear-mind-set-and-an-always-straightforward-nothing-but-the-left-follow-my-advice-type-of-the-most-strange-pianist-and-a-condoctor-of-a-its-oqn-language-called-A
.
Becaue she has not learned anything but to get an A all the class taughted by non-teacher-yet-teacher-looking-people-in-this---------X/
It was the end of the sounds
The end of reharsal!
hALLWWWWWVIENA?yet??????!!!!PARIS???
FRANK????EDWIN?????
blahblahblhaaaaaaaa.
yes i told you right (REALLUYYIRESO????) cut trash bye good bye.
i am a honestisticartifishwithabiggutsandtwobigsandales. I did MY homeworkinghardworkingstudentof eternaleducationalscientictichumanecomediasticworriorcalledLOVEplusoneeyeplushalfan eye.
You guessed right right?
my answer is always the very next to the next to the very last yet not the end.
So that is why you shouldnt have heard what i just said.
so pleaes turn down a request to give me a piano.
you have a computer.
so do I.
THat is why I am going all the time and never stop moving around.
because i am a bee like type of a fllower and a lionisticartificiallymadebywhoyoyougirltypemotherplusoridktheanswerpleasetellmekind of the right human typically spoken own language.
so please ignore her words and keep following your advice and stay alive.
this is the best advice i can give you.
sorry, i can do nothing but stay me!
so watch ME!!!! but never fly!!!!
CAUTION*I CAN FLY but YOU CAN NOT.
I CAN WALK WITH A TALE plus butterflies' help plus one feather from my best friend called Mino.
YET YOU MAY NOT.
your objection and yet but also
is to decide either or not to follow any of my advice of the world of brainstormingtechniqueofevacuation of vactination of a matter called poison of the nature.
you should watch all the apple give by nobody else but me.
ok?
i think i have told something that is and should never be accepted by anybody!!!!
but also by me?????
I am puzzled.
SO I start puzzling you one more time.
I m ready so i am not here already..........
now my job is to keep learning as long i can hear my silence.
because that is the sign that shows that i have finished working too hard to stay the most peaceful diehardest people on earth althoug i am not a human.
My job was to stay alive as an eilian artist????
im going to take all my time left for me in this story
to the subject of reading books.
so please turn off your computer and start watching movies.
I may or may not be one of them.
you may be the last to complete the task,
but there is no need to worry.
because i am always with you.
becaues you are my friend.
what is next?
i am going to go nowhere but backwords scratch this and add
upward and left!
????
my name is still a mystery plus chan in english???
or japanese???????
I have every possible answer!!!
i am a fearless girl yet the most peaceful and baby-like-body called an sivergoldenchestnutthatlookslike an ironplus a doll, colorfull leaves and a cuctus given my best possible answer on Sado. yet an adult with a watch of the world of the wisords and a strange teacher that looks like an extra ordinary person kind of a creative artist that may exist on this planet called school buildings may or may not be waiting for my next lesson.
so conductor, please read carefully and start playing my art.
i am going home to ready and study and steady.
i have grown up by being called an grade !!!! center of excellence of art school looking musical of hospitallicticallyspeakingphycedericpicadellisticalstudent and a strangest thing in my life.
im looking forward to see what you can shoe off to me!!!!
you can never win my game
because im just laughing and doing nothing but laugh my laugh.
wahhahha!
Get ready set and go!
the game has already started yo!!!
to all my couligues and students at AKHS:
your school smells very dangerous yet actually not at functining yet seeminglly working very right yet there is always at least one conflinct without resolution
so there is and has never been a situation called peace.
i got out safelly after teaching a course of living dead or sleep and stay silent and/or live vigorouslly and happilly ever after OR found dead by a mother called MOTHER F or R oh no! i cannot justify what is normally called injustice so i resigned before collapsing my own decisions.
STAND SAFE!
OTHERWISE YOU WILL DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PLEASE START WORKING CORRECTLLY>
THERE IS NO CONDITION OF PEACE IN THE BUILDING>
alcoholicsmellingyetseemingllyasleepandyetalwaystryingsomethinghardest???nimus minuets? and happenings of all the time with an fire alarm that do not know how to work (all of whom i now can call "friends") but your teacher has never taught you anything that matters in school. so i am not a good teacher but a good example.
i did all right at the school!
so i graduated by giving myself an ALLA
I can't stop being surprised by my own action, feeling, technique, plus an Aikido master of ceremonical scandals.
?????
I am paraparaperaahahahahanoko.
my name is!
pinoko
grin:)
*****
you are my star.
I love you all.
Thank you for listening carefully to my self-help-way-of-saving-everyoneofmyfriends'life-in-the-safest-possible-way-of-accepting-deception-by-the-----public-speaking-class-taughted-and-learned-by-a-challenging-happening-done-by-an-absent-minded-yet-always-awake-yet-sleeping-talkatistical-natural-born-with-no-bone-but-a-healthy-body-clear-mind-set-and-an-always-straightforward-nothing-but-the-left-follow-my-advice-type-of-the-most-strange-pianist-and-a-condoctor-of-a-its-oqn-language-called-A
.
Becaue she has not learned anything but to get an A all the class taughted by non-teacher-yet-teacher-looking-people-in-this---------X/
It was the end of the sounds
The end of reharsal!
hALLWWWWWVIENA?yet??????!!!!PARIS???
FRANK????EDWIN?????
blahblahblhaaaaaaaa.
Here is your present.
A pumpkin.
salt.
today.
get set, ready and go!
good luck to you all.
bye.
(from, yukotoiuko)
salt.
today.
get set, ready and go!
good luck to you all.
bye.
(from, yukotoiuko)
I AM A MOVIE STAR.
I CANNOT REMEMBER THE LAST MOVIE TITLE THAT I PLAYED>
SO I DONT KNOW HOW TO PLAY THE ROLE TWICE>
SORRY THERE IS NO SECOND TIME.
THAT IS LIFE>
THIS IS MY ANSWER TO MY OWN QUESTION and an answer.>
I HOPE YOU HAVE FOLLOWED MY BRAIN PATH>
CATCH ME IF YOU MAY or can or !?
SE E YOU SOME TI ME A G A I N now>
WHO DID YOU SEE the LAST?????
PLEASE STAY SILENT.
THANK YOU THANK YOu.
wink. twink domohorunrinckle?
This message was impossible to record, write or to be written.
THe end of a commission.
The start of a new question and the answers that may follow......................period.
SO I DONT KNOW HOW TO PLAY THE ROLE TWICE>
SORRY THERE IS NO SECOND TIME.
THAT IS LIFE>
THIS IS MY ANSWER TO MY OWN QUESTION and an answer.>
I HOPE YOU HAVE FOLLOWED MY BRAIN PATH>
CATCH ME IF YOU MAY or can or !?
SE E YOU SOME TI ME A G A I N now>
WHO DID YOU SEE the LAST?????
PLEASE STAY SILENT.
THANK YOU THANK YOu.
wink. twink domohorunrinckle?
This message was impossible to record, write or to be written.
THe end of a commission.
The start of a new question and the answers that may follow......................period.
THE FINAL GREETINGS.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH>
YOU ARE ALL PASSED>
THE REASON IS YOU ARE ALWAYS PRESENT
NO MATTER WHERE YOU ARE
WHAT YOU SEE
WHERE I AM
SO HERE I AM!
I KNEW THE RIGHT ANSREW???
I KNEW YOU KNEW I KNOW
pupupupupuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Ahhahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
SOFAMIREDO!
ARIGATOU!
MATARAISYUUUUUUUUUU
MATARAISYUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUPRE?
?
?
PERIOD.
:)
ありがとう。
プレゼント:
ういんくのはんぶん。
!
:0
:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:::::::::::::::::::::::::
oshimai.
chan chan!
YOU ARE ALL PASSED>
THE REASON IS YOU ARE ALWAYS PRESENT
NO MATTER WHERE YOU ARE
WHAT YOU SEE
WHERE I AM
SO HERE I AM!
I KNEW THE RIGHT ANSREW???
I KNEW YOU KNEW I KNOW
pupupupupuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Ahhahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
SOFAMIREDO!
ARIGATOU!
MATARAISYUUUUUUUUUU
MATARAISYUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUPRE?
?
?
PERIOD.
:)
ありがとう。
プレゼント:
ういんくのはんぶん。
!
:0
:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:::::::::::::::::::::::::
oshimai.
chan chan!
THE ANSWER #!.
MY NAME WAS FUSHIGICHAN>
MY OFFICE USED TO BE IN THE ONSEN>
YET THE OFFICE UNTIL YESTERDAY WAS A PLCE????????IMPOSSIBLE>
MY FATHER NAMED ME AFTER MY CARACTERICS>
SO YOU CAN NOT ANSWER THE QUESTION COLLECTLLY>
NOW YOU KNOW WHY>
I TOLD YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BUT YOU FAILED MY GAME>
YOU WERE INVALID TO ANSWER MY QUESTION>
THE RIGHT ANSWER IS YOU LOST MY GAME>
THE ORDER*
STOPP FOLLOWING ME>
AND FOP STEP ONE MORE THREE MORE AND ONE MORE STEP ASIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OK????
OK!(students)
WELL DONE.
NOW,
LETS dance TO THE RYTHM.
THE RYTHM IS WALTS>
I KNOW THE ANSWER!!!!
I AM ALWAYS COLLECT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SMILE SMILE SMILE SMILE
MAIL?
ADDRESS?
MOVIE?
STAR?
AMELI?
CAAA?
KIIII?
SUUUU?
MY NAME WAS COMEDY>
AHHHHHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
WOW
PHEW
:)
I WON!
WONDERFULLLLLLLLLL
YES YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL>
NOW>>>>>>>>>>>>
SEE YOU IN THE NEXT GALLAC...
I FOR GOT MY ANSWER>
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HER NAME WAS THE MR CORRECT??????
COLLECT?
COLLECTION?
MODEL?
HOTEL?
MOTEL?
ATEM?
ATOM?
SOPHYAAAAAAA?
OR?
NO BODY KNOWS!
THE END.
MY OFFICE USED TO BE IN THE ONSEN>
YET THE OFFICE UNTIL YESTERDAY WAS A PLCE????????IMPOSSIBLE>
MY FATHER NAMED ME AFTER MY CARACTERICS>
SO YOU CAN NOT ANSWER THE QUESTION COLLECTLLY>
NOW YOU KNOW WHY>
I TOLD YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BUT YOU FAILED MY GAME>
YOU WERE INVALID TO ANSWER MY QUESTION>
THE RIGHT ANSWER IS YOU LOST MY GAME>
THE ORDER*
STOPP FOLLOWING ME>
AND FOP STEP ONE MORE THREE MORE AND ONE MORE STEP ASIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OK????
OK!(students)
WELL DONE.
NOW,
LETS dance TO THE RYTHM.
THE RYTHM IS WALTS>
I KNOW THE ANSWER!!!!
I AM ALWAYS COLLECT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SMILE SMILE SMILE SMILE
MAIL?
ADDRESS?
MOVIE?
STAR?
AMELI?
CAAA?
KIIII?
SUUUU?
MY NAME WAS COMEDY>
AHHHHHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
WOW
PHEW
:)
I WON!
WONDERFULLLLLLLLLL
YES YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL>
NOW>>>>>>>>>>>>
SEE YOU IN THE NEXT GALLAC...
I FOR GOT MY ANSWER>
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HER NAME WAS THE MR CORRECT??????
COLLECT?
COLLECTION?
MODEL?
HOTEL?
MOTEL?
ATEM?
ATOM?
SOPHYAAAAAAA?
OR?
NO BODY KNOWS!
THE END.
Friday, October 30, 2009
The answer is she is 五対.
You are a child.
Your mother is a child slave.
Your sister is a TV lover, with infinate possibilities of being called an "Invalid".
Your mother is famous for her beauty and intelligence.
Not only is she a spernaturalbrainkilleroverslashslashsplushfully collect point of view,
she her a smile of the mother earth, Masters digree of the Science, Math, and Art.
She also is made of Golden mountains with a heart that tastes like the freegan hotchocolatetoolateicecream with a zest of mint plus minus metal plus ok melting mashmarrows plus punch and zendoh spirits.dash laugh walk coming back.
.........
I dont understand this experience.
I don't think you should look at this, or think about this, or remember what you have just shezzzsawn.
So do not let your brain move.
It's overdangerous.
Now you may stay relax, be content, make a smile, make a wish, and breathe plus minus a period of long silence and darkness, you may go back to work.
Someone is waiting for you.
I'll be waiting for you in the room #genious.
The door is closed.
I don't know why.
;)
oatmeal and cereal
nuts
and guts
ornamental
bonsai
phew
Your mother is a child slave.
Your sister is a TV lover, with infinate possibilities of being called an "Invalid".
Your mother is famous for her beauty and intelligence.
Not only is she a spernaturalbrainkilleroverslashslashsplushfully collect point of view,
she her a smile of the mother earth, Masters digree of the Science, Math, and Art.
She also is made of Golden mountains with a heart that tastes like the freegan hotchocolatetoolateicecream with a zest of mint plus minus metal plus ok melting mashmarrows plus punch and zendoh spirits.dash laugh walk coming back.
.........
I dont understand this experience.
I don't think you should look at this, or think about this, or remember what you have just shezzzsawn.
So do not let your brain move.
It's overdangerous.
Now you may stay relax, be content, make a smile, make a wish, and breathe plus minus a period of long silence and darkness, you may go back to work.
Someone is waiting for you.
I'll be waiting for you in the room #genious.
The door is closed.
I don't know why.
;)
oatmeal and cereal
nuts
and guts
ornamental
bonsai
phew
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Life is
expantion and concentration
much and little
many and few
far and near
fast and slow
strong and weak
quiet and loud
genious and stupid
black and non black
shade and light
the sun and the moon
babies and adults
giving and taking
sharing and monopoly
dependence and independence
all and one
with you and without you
im going to get ready for some sleep
much and little
many and few
far and near
fast and slow
strong and weak
quiet and loud
genious and stupid
black and non black
shade and light
the sun and the moon
babies and adults
giving and taking
sharing and monopoly
dependence and independence
all and one
with you and without you
im going to get ready for some sleep
Let's
Let's be polite.
Let's assume good faith.
Let's avoid personal attacks.
Let's be welcoming.
Let's love ourselves.
Let's live our life.
I love you.
Let's assume good faith.
Let's avoid personal attacks.
Let's be welcoming.
Let's love ourselves.
Let's live our life.
I love you.
My understanding of Life as of now, it is 11:30pm 2009 Oct. 27th. right here in my parents house in Aikawa, Sado, Niigata, Japan
What is life?
I want to become able to express my answer to the question in any way that any one of you can understand, someday. That means I do not have the ability to do so right now. I'm going to do my best though. I'd appreciate your understanding and patience.
Thank you.
Life is incomprehensible
nonjudgeable
can not be judged
can not be compared
can not be measured
can not be understood
has no rule
random
chaos
can be simple
can be complicated
can be hard
can be easy
can be happy
can be sad
can be stopped
can be unconscious
can be felt
can not be felt
to be touched
to be smelled
to be heard
to be seen
to be accepted
acceptance
tolerance
patience
training
invincible
Comfortable
Love
Thankfulness
Beauty
Nature
Feeling
Desire
Rationality
Instinct
Body
Mind
Always moving
1
氣
Infinite
Free
Completely relaxed
Completely soft
Warm
Fun
Exciting
Calm
Free
Pure
Sweet
Soft
Smooth
Gift
Ball-like shape
Energy
Giving
Caring
Realizing
Existence
Heat
Senses
Art
Science
Liberty
Amazing
Great
Chance
Co-existence
Smile
Happiness
Hope
Light
Fear-free
Worry-free
Opposite of life is death
death is static
death is 0(zero)
death is hopeless
I have life.
I want to become able to express my answer to the question in any way that any one of you can understand, someday. That means I do not have the ability to do so right now. I'm going to do my best though. I'd appreciate your understanding and patience.
Thank you.
Life is incomprehensible
nonjudgeable
can not be judged
can not be compared
can not be measured
can not be understood
has no rule
random
chaos
can be simple
can be complicated
can be hard
can be easy
can be happy
can be sad
can be stopped
can be unconscious
can be felt
can not be felt
to be touched
to be smelled
to be heard
to be seen
to be accepted
acceptance
tolerance
patience
training
invincible
Comfortable
Love
Thankfulness
Beauty
Nature
Feeling
Desire
Rationality
Instinct
Body
Mind
Always moving
1
氣
Infinite
Free
Completely relaxed
Completely soft
Warm
Fun
Exciting
Calm
Free
Pure
Sweet
Soft
Smooth
Gift
Ball-like shape
Energy
Giving
Caring
Realizing
Existence
Heat
Senses
Art
Science
Liberty
Amazing
Great
Chance
Co-existence
Smile
Happiness
Hope
Light
Fear-free
Worry-free
Opposite of life is death
death is static
death is 0(zero)
death is hopeless
I have life.
Monday, October 26, 2009
Today is Life Celebration Day you friends! Let's make a toast!
Dear you,
I was thinking about you today.
i've been working at a public high school called Aikawa high school
for about a month minus 2 weeks in a small town on Sado island,
Niigata prefecture, Japan, where I live and where i grew up until 18
years old and a month or so.
The principal of the Aikawa HS and one of the teachers I don't
dislike, who taught me English when I was a high school student asked
to help fill the vacant post of/ replace the former teacher of English
(he was full time and probably permanently licensed by the government)
who had been absent from work with mental health problems for about 3
weeks. I hear he had kept leaving and coming back for shorter periods
of time before the 3 week leave.
The school and the teachers were desperate with the situation and I
wanted to be of help so I agreed to work at the high school until the
end of December 09 for the meantime and started taking charge of 6
classes, 180 students about in total at the very end of september 2009
as a substitute teacher. I am there from 8:30am to 5pm on weekdays.
The education board of Niigata prefecture gave me a permit to teach
English and work full time at public HS which is valid for 3 years
from 28th Sept 2009. That was when I started working at the school and
it was 2 or 3 days after I was asked to.
as you know, the society we live in right now seems very ill,
unhealthy and much closer to collapsing than the time before our birth
and so I faced a lot of challenging situations like you have, where/
in which I wouldn't have been able to let my brain and heart accept
and or understand unless I expand the capability of my brain and the
tolerance of my friends and family who are always very supportive
thankfully. You needed to work harder than usual to help me stay
healthy and happy. It is getting harder everyday for you as an
individual to stay healthy and happy. So I imagine you are a bit tired
to help you and me.
Anyway, all the effort of mine and yours have helped me learn so much
about my self, you, meaning of and purpose of life, the earth,
universe, future, etc.
It's been feeling easier, less stressful and less uncomfortable for me
to think about these things, to understand and express my true
feelings and thoughts to me and you better. I realized I had never
felt so free and open before.
i have suffered and experienced a little bit of pain both mentally and
physically.
yet my life has been kept alive so far, right now i am doing well,
feeling ok, quite appreciative and not too pessimistic or depressed
about life, being able to breathe fine, eat, sleep, think, move, hear,
see, touch, smell, write, type, talk, and dream, i am not too hyper,
upset or too hopeful about things. I am not wanting my life to come to
an end at the moment. I am dreaming of the day when I can accept my
death and desire it when I face the need.
so i think i am doing a very super wonderfully great job right now on
our mission to "stay alive".
i am truly proud of myself for the first time in my life.
The main goal of me writing this email and sending this to you and all
the other friends of mine who can use the Internet and understand
written English is this.
To tell you my sincere thanks for not just staying honest, loving
yourself, staying alive and bettering yourself
but also supporting me, encouraging me, loving me and helping the world.
thank you, for being who you are.
I am grateful for having you as a teammate.
i love you very much,
let's keep trying not to lose hope yet.
*Cheers and hugs*
Yuko
I was thinking about you today.
i've been working at a public high school called Aikawa high school
for about a month minus 2 weeks in a small town on Sado island,
Niigata prefecture, Japan, where I live and where i grew up until 18
years old and a month or so.
The principal of the Aikawa HS and one of the teachers I don't
dislike, who taught me English when I was a high school student asked
to help fill the vacant post of/ replace the former teacher of English
(he was full time and probably permanently licensed by the government)
who had been absent from work with mental health problems for about 3
weeks. I hear he had kept leaving and coming back for shorter periods
of time before the 3 week leave.
The school and the teachers were desperate with the situation and I
wanted to be of help so I agreed to work at the high school until the
end of December 09 for the meantime and started taking charge of 6
classes, 180 students about in total at the very end of september 2009
as a substitute teacher. I am there from 8:30am to 5pm on weekdays.
The education board of Niigata prefecture gave me a permit to teach
English and work full time at public HS which is valid for 3 years
from 28th Sept 2009. That was when I started working at the school and
it was 2 or 3 days after I was asked to.
as you know, the society we live in right now seems very ill,
unhealthy and much closer to collapsing than the time before our birth
and so I faced a lot of challenging situations like you have, where/
in which I wouldn't have been able to let my brain and heart accept
and or understand unless I expand the capability of my brain and the
tolerance of my friends and family who are always very supportive
thankfully. You needed to work harder than usual to help me stay
healthy and happy. It is getting harder everyday for you as an
individual to stay healthy and happy. So I imagine you are a bit tired
to help you and me.
Anyway, all the effort of mine and yours have helped me learn so much
about my self, you, meaning of and purpose of life, the earth,
universe, future, etc.
It's been feeling easier, less stressful and less uncomfortable for me
to think about these things, to understand and express my true
feelings and thoughts to me and you better. I realized I had never
felt so free and open before.
i have suffered and experienced a little bit of pain both mentally and
physically.
yet my life has been kept alive so far, right now i am doing well,
feeling ok, quite appreciative and not too pessimistic or depressed
about life, being able to breathe fine, eat, sleep, think, move, hear,
see, touch, smell, write, type, talk, and dream, i am not too hyper,
upset or too hopeful about things. I am not wanting my life to come to
an end at the moment. I am dreaming of the day when I can accept my
death and desire it when I face the need.
so i think i am doing a very super wonderfully great job right now on
our mission to "stay alive".
i am truly proud of myself for the first time in my life.
The main goal of me writing this email and sending this to you and all
the other friends of mine who can use the Internet and understand
written English is this.
To tell you my sincere thanks for not just staying honest, loving
yourself, staying alive and bettering yourself
but also supporting me, encouraging me, loving me and helping the world.
thank you, for being who you are.
I am grateful for having you as a teammate.
i love you very much,
let's keep trying not to lose hope yet.
*Cheers and hugs*
Yuko
Friday, October 23, 2009
my profile updated
id be happy if you could take a new look at it.
there might be something fun????
yuko
there might be something fun????
yuko
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